What It Feels Like to Have a Childhood Best Friend

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 presetFrom first grade to your first kiss, your best friend has always had your back. How? Let us count thy ways:

1. You have an instant extra wardrobe. As kids, you probably met when your teacher asked you to fall in line by height. Your similar build was the first thing you had in common, and would most likely stay that way,even after puberty. Running out of clothes was never an option because her closet was always available to raid. Heck, you even have her clothes memorized, and this system of sharing worked both ways.

2. She will never, ever judge you. From the time you secretly peed your underwear in third grade to the first time you’ve ever gotten drunk in college, any concept of shame is gone with her. She will forever be the first person to know any stupid thing you’ve done, and will be your hero out of every sticky situation. All because…

3. You had gone through everything together. It started from grade school crushes to training bras, to your first period and your first heartbreak. For every milestone, she was the one by your side, as you both traversed the intricacies of childhood and adolescence. You can very well bet this will go on fully well into adulthood.

4. Rivalry is out of the picture. As the twosome that grew together in front of everyone’s eyes, both of you are bound for comparison: who became prettier, who became more academically successful, who had more admirers growing up. Yet, envy was a four-letter word that had no existence in your vocabulary as far as your friendship was concerned. It just didn’t work that way. You have always been happy for each other’s achievements from the little things to the big things, that it even gave you license to be a stage best friend, if there were such a thing.

5. She knows more about you than your family does. And how couldn’t she? All those years of hour-long phone calls, late-night texts and clingy moments all day long weren’t for nothing, after all. She was your rant buddy and you were her shock absorber, when every single thing seemed to go awry and you only had each other to lean on. You probably remember the first secret you ever told her, and since then, she has been sworn to secrecy for life.

6. She is always your go-to excuse for a last-minute sleepover. A sleepover? Just now? No way, your parents tell you. Your best friend has always been the exception to this rule, probably because your parents trusted her more than they trusted you. Of course, this came in handy for those early teenage years when dating boys was out of the question.

7. You share the vaguest of inside jokes. One cryptic stare or a weirdly fragmented phrase like, “You know about… that thing?” would have others dumbfounded but you and your bestie know exactly what that means because there’s just too many memories. There’s a lot of back story between you two that it would take ages for people to get clued in on every single one.

8. Though you share many similarities, you celebrate each other’s differences. She’s a K-Pop fan. You’re more of an indie-folk type. She’s into Star Wars. The movies you like Ewan McGregor in unfortunately has nothing to do with lightsabers. You don’t have to force each other to have the same tastes, but you owe it to her to show some interest. That also means taking one for the team and being the emergency concert buddy when plans with other fandom friends fall out.

9. Going different paths does not mean growing apart. It just means both of you grow together. A healthy friendship is being able to share so much yet finding your own individuality as well. Eventually you both go to different colleges, pursue other endeavors and encounter different people in your lives. Yet nothing and no one can threaten your bond forged through ages of playdates, note-passing and instant messaging. This also means having a wider circle, as your new friends became her friends, and her friends became yours.

10. She is the one person you can count on for tough love. While you revel in each other’s imperfections and embrace each other’s flaws, there’s no beating around the bush to the things that matter. Though words may hurt and interventions will sting, down the road you’ll look back on those petty arguments and be thankful she didn’t hold back, because she’s always looking out for you.. Always. #

To the future ninang of my children lightyears ahead, Bea, thank you for always being there through thick and thin.

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